Rheumatoid Arthritis, an autoimmune disorder that occurs when your immune system mistakenly attacks your own body’s tissues including your organs and joints. Let me tell you a little bit about this most Misunderstood Disease. Let me share with you the words that bind our lives together. Continue reading “RA-Rheumatoid Arthritis-The Words That Bind”→
If I tell you I am sick, do you believe me. If I tell you I have Rheumatoid Arthritis will you understand me. If I tell you I will always suffer with this disease are you with me and if I tell you I am chronic will you be with me!! RA the disease with so many questions and very few answers but it is chronic. Continue reading “RA- Rheumatoid Arthritis-I Am Chronic”→
You wake up if you have the luxury of sleeping at all, try your best to get your day going but there is something holding you down, Fatigue. That thing that’s weighing on you like a ton of bricks, that thing that’s sucking your energy from you from your head to your toes. You can’t move no matter how hard you try, no matter how hard you will your body to get up and go. The bed at this time is your ally. You lay in it when you can’t move or when you reach for it for support when you stumble back as you try to stand up but find that you just can’t. Our fatigue is not just being tired, it is being exhausted. It is a feeling you can’t explain to others to make them understand. Fatigue, yes we’re all so familiar with it.
You try your best to move through the exhaustion but it’s much harder than you ever imagined. You wonder when did this all began. Finally you realize this disease Rheumatoid Arthritis snuck it in on you before you knew what happened. You see, standing at the sink brushing your teeth became a chore and that should be a simple thing to do. You stare at yourself in disbelief wondering is this really real and that body in the mirror staring back lets you know, yes you are that person so worn out and exhausted. Sleep isn’t the answer, resting isn’t the answer nor is relaxing the answer. Our body is fighting us and we just have to wait for it to fix itself even if it takes a long time or if ever. Fatigue runs rampant with this disease that we are fighting and living with.
We’re fighting fatigue and that battle is a hard one. It doubles the torture we face daily with Rheumatoid Arthritis. Through the pain we have to deal with comes the fatigue that is brought on by our meds and our bodies trying to protect us. We are grounded by these 2 more than anyone will ever really know. No one can imagine trying to carry on a day struggling against pain while not having the strength to do so. It does no good to wish for a work day or day to end and our night to begin because sleep is not the cure for our enemy Fatigue. The thing that wrings our bodies dry.
How does it feel to be too exhausted to think, I’m sure no one can imagine that. You really won’t know the answer to that unless you felt it, unless your walk has been in one of our shoes. You can barely move and you certainly can’t get your mind to focus to make yourself move so there it is, your whole body controlled by fatigue. It is awful to feel that you are useless because of a body that just can’t do what you want. All of this makes you feel guilty towards yourself and those in your life. Does this sound extreme!! Maybe to some but this is no exaggeration. Getting up and to have to lay back down in exhaustion is a cry that we cry many days. It is something that is a struggle at the simplest level and there’s no cure for us. We are saying yes but our bodies are saying I just cannot. So the fight to go is an ongoing fight, one that fatigue so often wins.
Fatigue: Extreme tiredness from mental or physical illness. “He/She was nearly dead with Fatigue”. Sounds familiar!!
I’ve lost my identity to Rheumatoid Arthritis. Yes I see myself and I may look the same but in reality I’m not the same. This disease has me asking “Who Am I” and how do I come to accept the person that disease has made me. It’s hard but I will. My Fate My Foe!! Continue reading “RA-Rheumatoid Arthritis, My Fate-My Foe”→
You look at yourself in the mirror, you may smile or you may break down and cry. You smile because you may want to see yourself as you’ve always been but you may shed tears because you know that you’re no longer that person anymore and never will be again when it comes to doing all that you once could before Rheumatoid Arthritis came into your life. That person staring back is not the person who you once were but a silhouette of that person so you find yourself grieving for the “YOU” that’s lost to a disease that haunts you and those in your life in a way that you were never in a million years prepared for. You hug yourself in an effort to reassure yourself that everything is going to be okay but in reality you know that your life is in for a tough go and it has been forever changed and will never be okay the way it use to be. How quickly did this disease snatch your old life away and set in motion grief and guilt that weighs on you because you can’t live life the way you once could and the way you want too. Where have I gone? Continue reading “RA – Rheumatoid Arthritis-Grieving For That Old You”→
Words have power but for us, those words can change who we are. As sufferers of Rheumatoid Arthritis it’s not always easy for us to put our feelings into words nor is it always easy to share what we’re going through each and every day. With this comes a myriad of emotions for why this is happening to us and why we wish this should never be. Talking about our disease is never easy but being able to should never be the issue we have to deal with. Why should we have to figure out a way make those in our lives understand that our disease is a real disease and not something in our head, something made up or something exaggerated. It is a devastating life long auto immune disease that will always be a changing disease but can we keep trying to make people understand when their ears are closed, their eyes are shut and their minds are blank when it comes accepting to how this disease affects us. Continue reading “RA-Having Rheumatoid Arthritis-Listen Our Words Have Power”→
"You are more powerful than you think you are. Remind yourself of this. Stand up within yourself. Gather your mental, emotional, and spiritual strength, and speak from deep within your spirit and your soul. Take back your power Say..."I will survive. I will thrive. I am coming back. Giving up is not who I am. I will stay the course, and persist until I succeed." ~ Les Brown