RA and the family fit

Rheumatoid Arthritis is our chronic disease, one that we will never walk away from.  But most of all, one that we will be forever trying our best to explain, explain and explain again.  Once again, it is not ARTHRITIS.  No, it is not, it is an AUTO IMMUNE DISEASE. What that means for us is our body is fighting and fighting all that we have and we are suffering the consequences.  You may not see it but it is our truth and this is what we feel we are being forced to prove.

Are you just really tired and worn out from trying to get people to understand what you are going through and what this disease is all about.  Are you fed up with explaining how much you’re hurting and getting that puzzled look because you look healthy and they’re wondering what you’re talking about or thinking how can you be hurting when you look perfectly okay.  So next you face that mountain of questions as if you are the one confused about yourself and don’t seem to know your own problems.  When they’re asking you “What is that you have”;  Oh that arthritis disease…Are you at your wits end with people not understanding RA just as much as you are with Rheumatoid Arthritis itself.  Are you tired of others not accepting that you are really a sick person no matter how well you may look on the outside.  What they don’t know and understand, your outside may not always tell the truth about your inside.  Because it isn’t visible doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Some have visible signs but there are many who do not.

Why is it we just can’t seem to get through to people about our disease.  Why is it that we are brushed off when we are having problems, feeling sick, hurting to no end or just having a really emotional time.  These are the things they refuse to accept simply because a lot of us are not the typical “sick looking” person.  How can people today operate with thoughts like these.  How can so many be so ignorant about a disease that has far more dangerous effects than they can know or even care to know.    We are not responsible for being sick and we are not responsible for anyone who does not understand and who cares not to understand.  At the same time, we do not want to spend endless time trying over and over again reminding people of what this disease is and how it works, it is not fair to us considering the difference it will make.

Why is it so hard to get others to really accept this disease for what it is and to know it is not a simple thing. We are suffering so much more than many want to accept.  Trying time and time again to explain ourselves and this disease is more than we should have to endure.  Sometimes we try to defend ourselves by explaining what’s going on or maybe we just make light of it just for the sake of it but maybe it’s best to ignore them because if their minds are made up, it will make no difference.  We are going through enough and to have to deal with others who wants no part of our struggle is fruitless.  We have more on our plate than most can know and allowing others to control our lives is no way we should have to live.  We are already being controlled by RA and one more controlling factor is just way too much and unnecessary.

For those who think they have our answer to our prayers, it isn’t true.  Granted we are would love to have the right answers but truthfully there isn’t a perfect fix for any of us.  What many may think is the answer to what ales us as they say, is not the typical rub, wrap, medicine or exercise that will get rid of it.  While they think it is that simple, they have missed the mark by millions.  Confusion about Rheumatoid Arthritis brings forward those that want no part, those that don’t understand, those that care not to understand and those that think they understand and know the cure to our disease.  This keeps us fighting for understanding just as hard as we fight with this disease.  While we are forever fighting for our place with RA, for our support and understanding as well, there should never, ever be times wasted on force feeding ones who fail to or want to be involved in any way.

Rheumatoid Arthritis is complicated because of it being a complicated auto immune disease and not because it is really hard to understand.  It is hard to understand because many refuse to.  Take a little time to get to know our disease truthfully then you will understand, it will surely make a difference to all.  I’m sure, this will be my plea years from now but I will continue with it for as long as it takes.  You see no way should we have to stop and think about what we should say to anyone about our disease.  But this is not true in our case with RA.  This is a shame, a shame for those of us who are suffering and to feel we should stop, think, answer or not is definitely not the way it should be in our world.  A world ruled by a disease we have no control over ever, Rheumatoid Arthritis.

photo credit: diamondmack