Rheumatoid Arthritis or for those of us who has it, it’s known as Rheumatoid Disease. To those that don’t know or don’t understand this is a brutal disease. No I’m not exaggerating, it’s a Disease without a Cause. Something that keeps going and changing on a daily basis, something that can’t ever be said when describing it “oh it’s okay”.
For most of us our disease started long before our diagnosis. Simply by knowing something was wrong, just did not know what. Getting the diagnosis whether expecting rheumatoid arthritis or something like it did not make hearing it any less painful. Finding out you would be dealing with a disease like this put your mind into a tailspin.
At first there was no understanding of the implications of what this meant but over time we would learn there are so many facets to this disease and none are positive for us. We listened, we’re confused and some may cry but one thing for sure, we all knew things would be forever different. We found it hard to ask a lot of questions at first because we really didn’t have a clue but we did managed to ask the basic “what do I do now”. We find ourselves thinking, how can I explain and make my family understand when right now I don’t understand.
As time passed, we learned more and more about Rheumatoid Arthritis but for us it was from our own experiences. There are never enough words that can explain this disease better than a person who is dealing with it. We are the written diagnosis, symptoms, battles and struggles, so we can say it and show it better than any book or literature can. When we say to those around us how hard, how painful and how depressing this disease is, it’s from our own personal understanding and experience. Additionally, when we say we fight this battle everyday, we are doing it. Through every painful joint, every fatigued moment and every stressed time, yes we are doing it.
So have we come to terms with this disease? In some ways we may have but because it’s forever changing, we aren’t given a chance to get a grip on the fight with it. Our battle with it can be different daily so we find that keeps us off-balance. Working with our own knowledge and understanding takes time but we may find we’re burdened with the task of trying to make others understand and this challenge can keep us in a state of emotional uproar so coming to terms with all of this can possibly be an unreachable goal. Still fighting is our purpose and this is what we do through all of the tough times this bitter disease brings with it.
We do realize we have met a disease that offers no pity and keeps us at a point of confusion but we know for ourselves that learning and finding how to fight back is our only possible way of gaining perspective of Rheumatoid Arthritis. It is without a doubt a disease that has changed us in ways untold but it’s without a doubt that we will continue the challenge of fighting with a disease that’s so misunderstood by many.